What a day I had yesterday!!! Racing in the Olympics has always been a dream of mine... Racing in the Olympic downhill always seemed like the most extreme, insane thing I could ever shoot for... And yesterday, I did just that. It was such a crazy, intense, magical atmosphere in the start gate--I couldn't decide whether to be jazzed or pee-my-pants-nervous. I think a combination of these emotions pushed me out of the gate and caught me charging down the course. It was a tough day of racing. I knew I had a shot at a medal, and I think that knowledge in itself made me a little stiff. Needless to say, I was incredibly nervous. I was feeling good and fast on the top part of the course, but I came into the flat section a bit tentatively and didn't carry quite as much speed as I could have. I was a bit tense, getting tossed over a few rollers and not tucking quite as much as possible... but in the end, it turned out to be a really good run. The best run of my season, in fact. I came down into 3rd position, behind two really talented, speedy girls, so I was happy (I ended up 11th overall!). Having my family in the finish was also such a warming feeling...knowing that there were people at the bottom to hug and love me, regardless of what place I came in to. (plus, they had an awesome sign) It was a relief to have made it down with both skis on, as I managed to lose one part way down the course two days before. Just crossing the finish line was such an incredible feeling, I knew it didn't matter who I beat, or what the outcome was. Just being here at the Olympics has been more than I could have ever asked for... I had a function this morning with some USSA trustees, and while we (the alpine speed girls) were at the front of the room talking about our experiences, Stacey brought up a really neat point... It's not all about winning medals. Although the medal count is pretty much all anyone talks about, the experience we're gaining just by being here is so significant, life-changing, and irreplaceable, it's hard to think that a medal could elevate it any more. I'm learning so much about myself, about traveling, about the world and about living that I would have otherwise completely missed out on. These lessons are extremely special in so many ways: I had to work my ass off to get here, so much luck has come my way during my journey, and I just happened to be in the right place at the right time. Like now... here I am, in Russia, riding a train up into the mountains, learning about the ways of the world, change, and all about myself. I'm growing tremendously with these experiences, suffering unbelievably, bouncing up and down, sometimes flying and sometimes drowning. And I wouldn't trade it for the world. On a lighter note, after the downhill race yesterday I found out that I also get to race in the super-g!!! That race is on Saturday (Friday late night if you're reading this from Oregon), so I took a day off to rest and hang out with my family today. While riding down on the train from the mountains I looked out my window to see sun-bathers on the beach. It's amazing how warm it is here right now, yet how great the conditions on the hill are. It's definitely getting warmer every day, and the snow softens up and gets bumpier with every sun rise and set, but the weather has been basically perfect since the day we arrived here in Sochi. I met my family at their train stop, and we headed into Sochi (actual Sochi, the city) to check it out. We walked all over the city, exploring the arboretum and riding a crazy tram to the top of a hill that overlooked much of the city. We walked some more, and then some more, and made it down to the boardwalk where all the cruise ships are docked. I actually heard that some of the athlete's parents are staying on these cruise ships, due to lack of space in (completed, occupancy-approved) hotels. It seems crazy to step off a cruise ship in the morning and be in the snowy mountains a few hours later... that's dedication! And a lot of walking, shuttles, train and gondola riding, etc. But walking along the Black Sea was beautiful, and such a nice change from the insanity of the Olympics for a few hours. Not only was it beautiful, it was WARM. As in, walk-around-in-a-tank-top warm. It felt lovely to soak up some sun on my pasty-white skin. We ate lunner (lunch-dinner?) at an amazing Georgian restaurant that my sister Allana was determined to dine at. It was quite the trek to get there, but we were all thankful after filling our bellies with scrumptious Georgian food (Allana visited Georgia last year, so ordered perfectly for the whole table...nom nom). (above--view from the tram at the top of the city, and a self-proclaimed 'bench' in the park) After gorging ourselves on too much food, we headed back to the train. My family disembarked at their stop, and I'm continuing up to Rosa Khutor, the Olympic mountain village. The sun is setting peacefully over the Black Sea, and I'm feeling fulfilled and rejuvenated after a day of adventuring. Thus far my journey has been insane, busy, uplifting, stressful, and enchanting. I'm glad I have my family here to help me soak it up and keep me grounded, because there's a lot to take in. I'm so blessed to be here...it's all still a bit surreal. But I'm embracing it and enjoying seeing all of your support and kind words during this ride of my life. I've got a few days left, so I'm going to live it up and take advantage of every minute.
So with love, hope, and hugs, I'm signing out. <3 <3 <3 Laurenne
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Well, I got to race in my first Olympic event yesterday... and it was so exciting!!! I was pumped up and ready to go in the start, so charged with all the energy and excitement. I went out skiing hard and making some fast turns, but unfortunately my binding pre-released on the pitch and I slid on my side instead of finishing on my feet... But I had an amazing day anyway. It was so inspiring and incredible to watch Jules ski to bronze...what a crazy race! Her ability to perform when it counts is unbelievable. She is such an awesome teammate to have around and I was so psyched to cheer her on in the finish. I was skiing really fast before my mishap yesterday (green light!), so I'm happy to say I left it all out on the hill. Sometimes those freak things just happen--there's no one to blame and nothing to do about it now, so I'm just glad that I gave it all I had and can take my speed into the downhill race tomorrow. I have some pent-up energy from yesterday that I didn't get to use, so I'm harnessing that for tomorrow's race. I'm starting #7, and the race is at 11am (11pm PST).You can stream the race live on NBColympics.com so tune in and cheer me on!!! It's been so wonderful to have my family here with me. They bring a little piece of home and a whole lot of love to me here in Russia. It has also been absolutely AMAZING to see and feel all the love and support from friends, fans, and family back home (and all around the world!). I have received countless emails, messages, posts and wishes from all of you and it means so much to know I have so many supporters and so much love on my side. So THANK YOU :-) No matter what happens over these next couple of days, I have had the time of my life thus far. The energy here is so magical and indescribable, I fear I won't feel it for another 4 years, or perhaps ever again. So I'm embracing and enjoying every moment of this journey and feel so so blessed and lucky to be here. Win or lose, I have made here and know that it doesn't get any better.
peace and love to all It appears as if the text in my previous posts is not showing up on my blog, which is unfortunate because I have been updating on my life experiences, which have been plentiful over the last few days. Alas! I am on it now.
Today in our training run we had a time trial for downhill race spots here in Sochi. It was a bit nerve racking to think that I was racing for a spot in the Olympic downhill...and although I skied a bit passively on the upper section of the course, I let it go and was pretty speedy on the bottom. I was fifth in the training run today, with two girls in front of me who missed gates (one being Jackie, my fellow Oregonian). To earn a spot, we had to be top 7, so it feels good to say.... I'M RACING IN THE OLYMPIC DOWNHILL!!!! YAY! Last year at World Champs I missed out on the downhill spot, so it feels like I have earned my spot back. I am getting more and more comfortable on my skis, and I feel really good about the course and conditions here in Sochi. The snow is a bit harder, icier than we're used to on the World Cup circuit, which I think plays nicely to my style of skiing. I'm really psyched to race, to get out there and see what I can pull off on race day... Tomorrow is the men's downhill, and I plan on going up to be a spectator. I'm trying to embrace every part of this experience that I possibly can because, who knows, it could be a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.My family landed I'm Sochi today, so I look forward to having them here for support and love, and to bring a part of home into my Olympic journey. Fun :-) The opening ceremonies last night were incredible. With all of the production that went into it: acting, choreography, costumes, music, lights, fire, smoke, dancing, fireworks and props--it turned out to be everything they had hoped, perhaps more. I'll post a few pictures below. Anyhow, tomorrow is a rest day, so I'm going to get to bed soon and get some more sleep. I lost a little last night with the opening ceremonies going so late and our training run starting so early. SO worth it! peace and love. I bought myself a nifty little camera (compact system) over X-mas break and have been taking photos again. It's less bulky to travel with, and takes easy, high-quality photos. Although it's not 7d, it does the trick and I'm having fun experimenting with it. So here are some shots I've taken of late... skiing on a sunny day in Ultental, Italy ...and then getting snowed in interesting mossy wall art at the Life Balance hotel in Ultental reflections wine bread with Mac and Annabelle at dinner desert spread...amazeballs! beautiful sunrise in Ultental and another camera experiments on days of boredom.... (above and below) and some more camera experiments while walking along the river path in St. Johann... purple Lindsay waterberries more reflections below and above. peace and love.
It has been a lengthy, grueling, and somewhat painful opening of my ski season. I have been struggling to figure out a comfortable setup on winter snow. But it is slowly coming together and despite the struggles I have thus far endured this winter I somehow feel happy and hopeful. The races in Beaver Creek and Lake Louise were not exactly what our team was expecting. We came into the season as the best women's speed team in the world, and our expectations were high. When the first few races of the season were completed we all came to the realization that you can't always win. It's seemingly more difficult to be chased than to chase, and with all the hype around our team this prep period I think we all underestimated the rest of the world. But we also underestimated ourselves--or at least I have underestimated myself during the past month of opening races. It's so easy to get caught up in all the chatter, all the commotion, all the pressure. Sometimes I forget how enormous this world is--I get stuck in my tiny little bubble of ski racing and every misstep becomes a disaster. When the only thing that exists is not going your way, nothing feels right. Nothing can open your eyes or alter your mindset when you get this narrow, darkened tunnel vision. A little shake and your whole world turns upside-down. One moment you're on your feet, then next moment you're hanging by a thread--distraught and broken. Desperate for air, prepared to give up. I'm ready to throw my hands up and suddenly I feel free. Like it can't really go much worse....so what do I have to lose? My balance has been thrown off. I've been venturing to some dark places that I haven't ever been and I've gotten incredibly lost. I feel myself dipping in and out of these phases, never really finding a sustainable, even ground. And the hardest thing has been admitting it all. Finding a way to express yourself can often be difficult: you become vulnerable. Weak. Miniscule. Trying to break out of a bubble when the oxygen outside is impure. Aching for air under water when you know you have the time and capacity to remain below for longer. The biggest challenge is to talk yourself into embracing the fear, to sit with your devil while it's much easier to simply ignore it all. But lately I've been brave. Honest. Real. Everyone doubts themselves at one point or another, so why not plunge in that confusion and try to understand it? It's bigger than I ever imagined it to be, and maybe sometimes it's even stronger than me. I'm getting to know the other Laurenne. And yeah, she's pretty fucking crazy. All craziness aside, I kind of like her. I have a very logical way of thinking: there's no way of talking myself into a state or satisfaction that I know is unrealistic--magical, other-worldly, unattainable. But there is so much to see, so many opportunities, so vast a world that I'm brought to the ground: light and empty and self-ruling, best of all. Friends come around and inspire me. A sunrise, though red and accompanied by a storm, is calming and liberating. The feeling of a good turn--snow and skis and connection to it all--illuminates all the promise and kinship of being a part of this mad fight for life on earth. We're all human, and we're not going to be around for much longer. It is humbling to think of death and space, nothingness and my role in the whole dance. After all, what is the purpose of our existence? Being doubtful of an answer is helping me to understand that, sadly and somehow reassuringly, there is no means to our end. Which inevitably approaches...who knows how quickly? So if there's really no point, no impact, no resolve, then why worry about anything at all? It seems strange to be so outwardly pessimistic, as I've always been a fighter: determined, passionate, and devoted to finding an answer. But the inescapable lack of solution makes everything seem right. It makes every body seem so bare. Like we're all the same. Like we're all made of stardust. If all attempts are futile, regardless of momentary outcomes, there is not much to agonize over. So we might as well just be. And be free. While down in Portillo, Chile I had only my film camera. Therefore, I have no photos (yet) to post on here. However, I do have some fun photographs from my summer that may be appealing to one or two people out there. Enjoy :) I'm really not even sure what happened here. I sent some of my film photos (from the last few years!) in to get developed, and there was some sort of glitch in the development (or perhaps the photo taking). Some of the photos got overlapped, which actually turned out quite neat... tailgating on the escape (film) hiking around Sunshine Village, Alberta last August (film) a butterfly on my window screen (film) skate park at Venice Beach, CA this April (film) a night cruising around LA--at the Chinese Theatre (film) in the funny batch. some Beach, CA (film) thanks for this one, T Ford. Oregon beach time this May thanks blue moon (film) driving around LA (film) Raman at work Canadian wilderness (film) near Yachats, OR Oh Wiley (film) babes at Venice Beach, CA (film) trying to reel it in (photo cred? Tommy/Raman) Lauren and Laurenne at Courtney's wedding last October (film) shooting things with wooden sticks. a new form of sticking. another strange one. one of my favorites (film). peace and love.
Every summer leading up to the first on-snow camp is a bit of a grind. It takes a lot of patience to spend at least 3 hours a day in the gym (not to mention the other hours spent doing outdoor cardio…not as bad!), picking up dumbbells, jumping on boxes, spinning on a stationary bike one leg at a time, giving 100% doing something you often realize you despise. And one thing I definitely despise is working out inside. It’s hard to find the motivation to push myself in a stinky gym with sweaty meatheads, piling questions and stares, and no one to work out with (thank the gods for mountain biking!). But after the first day of skiing every summer I know why I do it, where I find the drive, how I get all crazy-eyed and squat more than I even want to.
It happened again! Here I am in El Colorado, Chile. Skiing my face off. In fact, tomorrow is our last day of training…then I’m headed back to Oregon. Back to the gym. Back to the heat. It’s funny to transition between seasons so many times a year. Coming down to Chile is an especially drastic transition. It has been below -10 (Celcius) for the last few days of skiing, and it felt like -40. My body is just not used to the cold at this time of year. But now I’m becoming addicted, and I’m not sure I want to leave. Although I’m sad to leave, the progress I have made here has been incredibly fruitful. I feel so good on my new equipment (thanks, Völkl/Marker/Lange!), and so many changes that I have been trying to make for years are naturally occurring with the help of what’s on my feet. I will post some videos of skiing soon, but for now…enjoy these pictures from the GoPro! Peace and love. at "heaven beach" (we made that up) with Stacey. Yeahhhhh, so this trip actually happened in January...but I decided it's time to catch up with my blogging. I am going to keep the words short and sweet--mainly because it was so long ago and I can't remember every intricate detail, but also because I am sitting in an airport and want to have this post done before I get on my plane headed for HOME! So I'll start with a few photos: prepping for some surf at Playa Blanca--beach break! Stacey atop a random mountain we decided to conquer one day. We had a near-perfect 360 degree view of the ocean.... Stacey--on our beach run during our final morning. You'll see plenty of picture of Stacey, as she was really my only subject :) It was tough to beat the time we spent on Lanzarote--with all the peace and solitude, delicious food, and gorgeous, isolated beaches. But Fuerteventura was like a completely distinct country. It was much less touristy (though it was down-season in Lanzarote, it still seemed like a tourist destination), had more local charm and character, and was a bit more upbeat. I was dying to surf once we got on the island, as I had heard that you could surf year round and there were plenty of good breaks around the island. But on our first afternoon on Fuerteventura--we arrived a little later than we thought--we had a workout to accomplish. So we looked around and decided to conquer a mountain. It was a small mountain, but nonetheless one of the highest on the island. It was really incredible and unique to be able to see ocean surrounding you--360 degrees around--something that makes you feel insignificant and infinitesimal (a feeling I inexplicably enjoy). I took some crazy photos from atop the mountain (see this page's headliner), and when we tired of being blown around by the powerful winds, we ran down the shaley, steep side hill... At the bottom of the shale hill--this was on a plateau, a false summit, a mountain valley, a circle of life, of sun, of light a dark, abandoned building on our walk back from the climb a lighter, livelier part of the dark building We stayed in a wonderful hostel-type-house called "Beach Bums," owned by a few Italian folks and updated quite nicely. We bunked in one of the smaller, older rooms with two beds, a private bathroom, and a communal kitchen and lounge area. It was a very neat compound with fun people and a great vibe. the lounge area at Beach Bums looking up from inside the communal area at night We awoke the next morning to go surfing.... It was pretty surreal to surf in the middle of the ski season. The water wasn't even all that cold--our wetsuits were only 3,2's. Stacey and I both had a tough time catching any waves in the incredible line of beach break. We pretty much just got pounded and did a lot of paddling. But the few waves I did catch made it all worth it, as I suppose it always is with surfing. I surely have mentioned this feeling before: working with something so big and powerful, riding something so pure and real, feeling a natural force so strong and unforgiving--it really is something perplexing and mystifying, only describable by a feeling... popcorn sand... The next day after our workout we went exploring down a dirt road--with no goal in mind and plenty of time we discovered a popcorn beach, a hippie shack, a crazy lighthouse, and the most incredible beach in the world with a gorgeous wade-pool inlet and a view to die for... just some interesting beach garbage heaven beach the crazy hippie shack jumping whatever. the lighthouse the dirt road we ventured down... a beach somewhere along the dirt road neat graffiti soaring Yuh what's up Stace num num popcorn beach deformed scoping We drove along this dirt road all the way from Corralejo to El Cotillo, where we decided to sit at a restaurant on the water and watch the sun go down. What a lovely closing evening...delicious, fresh fish (with their heads still on, mouths agape), more Sangria, and another (boring) breathtaking sunset while sitting on the ocean deck of La Vaca Azul (the restaurant). looking out from our table at La Vaca Azul Stacey playing el capitan a fuzzy El Cotillo at night The next morning we woke up, packed our things, and headed to Puerto Del Rosario to go for a jaunt and play in the ocean before catching our flight that early afternoon. We searched for a place to rent bikes, but as our time floated off we decided to just run along the beach and then jump in the water one last time before returning to winter again... cooling down after our run in the sun the better half of cooling down --no, Stacey did not drown how I love GoPros. I was sad to leave Fuerteventura (and Lanzarote), and the Canary Islands in general, but it was a well-deserved mid-season break from our crazy world of snow that I was ready to return to. Overall I think I enjoyed Fuerteventura a bit more than Lanzarote--it simply felt more raw and real. It certainly was dirtier and probably a bit sketchier, but I enjoy exploring a place and its reality. I find it less charming when a culture has conformed from its roots to its tourism, and it seemed that Lanzarote had done that a bit. It was, however, incredibly relaxing to stay at a spa/resort and eat amazing food (not schnitzel!) for a few days before roughing it a bit more in Fuerteventura. After all is said and done, I am looking forward to the day when I can return to the Canary Islands, and I hope I get the opportunity to explore a few more of the islands next time. Considering the fact that I spend almost the whole winter in Europe every year, I see myself returning to the islands soon. And I am smiling just thinking about frolicking in the ocean mid-winter. What a trip. a colorful night wading in El Cotillo's ocean
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April 2021
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